Halfway through dinner your youngest daughter stands up and sings a top-of-the-lungs medley of "Jesus Loves Me", "Mary Had a Little Lamb", and other un-discernible lyrics all mixed together. It was enough to entice big sister to join in the singing festivities. Who would have guessed that steak sub night would turn into "Showtime at the Kitchen Table"?
You now know that shopping online for pre-Black Friday deals for your son whilst baking is not the best idea. After an emergency trip to Publix for more eggs, your pumpkin roll is 100% better, or at least, less burnt this go round.
The likelihood of a poop catastrophe is inversely proportional to how late you are running to get somewhere.
Your two year old calls it "Mitch". Your five year old calls it "The Griddle". You and the rest of the world know it as "The Grinch"...and even though it's only November 30th, you've watched it at least two dozen times already. During one viewing, your five year old quipped, "I don't think he likes Halloween or Thanksgiving either."
That loud boom you heard in the foyer was your two year old's forehead hitting the corner of a column. If they ever remake Scarface, you're totally going to make her audition for the role.
Your "favorite" part is the perfect outline of a bandaid rash that showed up overnight while you were trying to control the bleeding. Apparently she's allergic to those. Like her mother.
Last year for Christmas your mother-in-law gave you a super cool advent calendar. When you unpacked it this year, your two year old ripped two doorknobs off the tiny doors before you even had a chance to fill it with activities. Maybe she thinks they're actual doorknobs and need to be twisted.
To make the story even better, she left one of these tiny doorknobs on your floor, which you immediately vacuumed up without knowing. This provided you with 30 minutes of fun digging through vaccum cleaner waste products which all-too-closely resembled those owl pellets you dissected in middle school.
Good news though - you found it. Plus a Box Top for the school collection which starts tomorrow. Hello 10cents for the elementary school. (I bet they'll really appreciate that one. At least you got all of the hair off of it...)
This concludes 30 days of National Blog Posting Month. I'm guessing my posts will be fewer and farther between in the month of December (you're welcome). But then again, maybe not. I'm becoming spontaneous in my old age.