Top Ten Mom Things...

As many of you well know, I've been at this whole "Mom Things" thing for over a year now.  I can't tell you how much I've enjoyed just noticing the small things my kids do that make me smile/cringe/nearly wet my pants...you get the picture.  While I've got plenty more up my sleeve, I'm going to do a little something different this week (thanks to a prompt over at Work, Wife, Mom...Life! for Working Mommy Wednesday, where Julia has challenged us to write a Top Ten...of anything.

Well, I'm re-posting my top ten favorite Mom Things from the past fifty-two (whoa!) posts of Mom Things.  Some of those oldies were pretty good, if I might say so myself.  (Okay, that was nothing but a bold-faced brag.  I promise not to do it again.)

Without further ado, I give you my personal Top 10 Favorite Mom Things (in no particular order at all):

#1.  You've been out in public with a diapered child who just filled their britches with #2, only to realize you're out of wipes. BUT, you have a glove compartment full of Zaxby's napkins and half of a bottle of water. No wipes? No problem.

#2.  In an effort to stay on top of things, you slipped a sympathy card in your purse so you could send it from work when you had a moment to breathe.  Weeks pass, and you discover the card in your purse.  That's when Mommy-brain kicks in and, to your own horror, you can't remember who died.

#3.  You fear going to the pediatrician's office, especially for well-child check ups because you know the place is teeming with germs.  If you're all healthy two or three days later, you thank your lucky stars you made it through unscathed, and vow to write a thank you note to Purell and immunity supporting Flintstone vitamins for making it all possible.

#4.  You've answered the door to a solicitor on a Saturday morning sans make-up, with hair disheveled, mismatching pj's on, and a kid in Ninja Turtle costume at your side, only to be asked if the man or woman of the house was home.  Yeah, lady.  You're looking at her.

#5.  You learned the hard way that giving your child sugar wafers  in the grocery store is a bad way to keep them occupied.  Unless, of course, it's your goal to have a hyperactive two year old that sprints and squeals up and down the aisles of Kroger.  (Fortunately, you learned this when you only had one child to contend with.)

#6a.  You pick your son up from school to find him wearing only his undershirt.  His response after you ask him where his shirt is:  "I lost it."  You ponder, momentarily, how one can "lose" a shirt, but don't even bother asking.

#6b.  You subsequently head to the school's Lost and Found and leave with four other items that he "lost" at school over the course of the year, including his lunchbox, two jackets, and his spirit day t-shirt.

#7.  Because it was Easter, you attempted to get all of your kids to smile and look at the camera, and you got this in the process -

#8.  You're proud of your little ones for learning to share....but if they'd been selfish with the Pink Eye, you'd have been okay with that.

#9.  You liken white pants on toddlers to unicorns.  They're pretty but you don't believe in them.

#10.  When your six year old tells you he can run a mile faster than you, you tell him to put his running shoes on.  About half a mile into it, he eats crow.  And while you feel a little bit bad about saying, "Booyah!" to a little boy, you think you made an excellent point about the dangers of talking smack.

Extra Credit #11.  At any point, your three year old has streaked completely naked across your front yard.  And you're certain that your reaction to her running naked across the neighborhood (which involved flailing of limbs and shrieking of "ABBY!!!  Come here RIGHT NOW!") drew way more attention than her tiny, lighting fast hiney did in the first place.

Linking up today also with Mommy of a Monster (I mean toddler) at


Crystal said...

Oh, number two has me rolling!!!

Diane said...

I like #9. I think that only grandparents buy white pants (or dresses) for toddlers. For the record, as Fiona's mother, I do believe in unicorns!

Also, on #10... be careful! My seven-year-old just ran an 8:53 mile, which is four seconds shorter than my fastest documented time. Ben is going to have you eating his dust next year...

Jennifer said...

I love #10 but I was the one who ended up eating my words last spring in a 10K. While I had more endurance at the end of the race, his starting pace was much faster than mine...a fact he pointed out frequently in the first 4 miles!

Julia said...

this was hilarious!!! how does one lose a shirt???? and pictures... ugh, it's impossible

Amanda said...

ROFL, especially on #9. I don't even buy white t-shirts for my kids or myself anymore...we never manage to keep them clean! I also love #7. Oh, the family pictures - they are the things nightmares are made of! lol Following you on both your blogs - love them! Thanks for being part of WMW.

Unpolished Parenting said...

Fantastic list! And the picture has me in tears from laughing... I mean isn't it the truth? Gotta love being a mom :) :) :)

kt moxie said...

I've done #2, and I LOVE #9!

Susan DiMickele said...

I'm all over the naked kid runs! And I can't tell you how many cards (sympathy, birthday, you anme it) are stuck at the bottom of my purse!

Debbie said...

No fair. Flag on the play. Whatever you call it. YOU got to pick ten (or eleven or twelve if you count the cheating up there...) I can't crown just one.

But MAYBE it would be the streaker. I loved that the first time. Or maybe the one about white pants and unicorns. Or maybe...

Never mind.

Denise said...

Love #6. First that he lost his shirt and you didn't ask why. Then, since you "found" all of his stuff in the lost and found at school, you clearly understand that cute little boy of yours!

IMO the show stopper is #11. I can just picture the whole scene and I'm laughing right out loud!!

Gina said...

I loved this post! I relate to #3. I refused to sit in the waiting room of my pedi with my infant because there were sick kids in there. The office manager asked me to please sit down, and I refused. I told them they needed a sick and healthy waiting room. (They still don't have one.)

Sharon Kirby said...

My favorite was #10 - I can just picture the WHOLE scene!! Too, too funny! You know, when boys get older, it's a little harder to talk smack - however, you KNOW their history, and you DO HAVE naked baby pictures!! That alone should win just about any verbal battle!

I also loved #7 - just experiencing a little family joy, eh?!


p.s. You can claim bragging rights - this post was hysterical!!

Minivan Mommy said...

#9- too funny. And I love the Easter picture... I bet it's funny to look at now but I can only imagine the frustration when it was happening.

0s0-Pa said...

Gotta love #1 on your list! Classic and I think most moms can relate to something quite similar!
-Jack @ New Bingo Sites

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