You trick your kid into taking medicine by telling her it's candy. The plan backfires when, days later at 100% health, she approaches you with a medicine bottle and dropper asking for more candy.
On a related note, you have another child who cannot be tricked or bribed, and you've had to resort to holding them down and force-feeding them medicine though tears and locked-lips. It is truly amazing how strong small children can be! And don't even get me started on the eye drops...
You never knew how passionately you would feel about things like diaper choices, public schools, vaccinations, breastfeeding, being a work-out-of-the-home mom, and about a zillion other things that prior to becoming a mother meant very little or nothing at all to you.
Your non-mom friends are less than thrilled when you try to discuss your childrens' excretions with them. Whereas, qualilty, quantity, color, and texture of your childrens' poop, vomit, and boogers are freely discussed among your mother peers.
It makes you sad that people tend to only comment on your baby and blond haired, blue eyed child when out in public, even though the brown haired, brown eyed child doesn't seem to care one bit. (Maybe it's because he already knows he's equally as precious as his baby sisters...)
When out running errands, you decide to grab lunch and opt for the Chick-Fil-A at the mall food court rather than the stand-alone one knowing full well if you go to that one it'll be at least an hour before you can coax the kids off the playground.
You wore dark sunglasses (*cough* umm, all day) to mask the tears when you dropped your child off for his first week of elementary school.
It all of the sudden hits you like a ton of bricks one day that your three year old isn't a baby anymore. In fact, she looks more like a teenager with her lanky arms and legs in her jeans, form-fitting t-shirt, and sneakers. You wonder where you were when that transformation happened.
You've been faced with the dilemma of "the lost teeth". So feel free to enlighten me. What *does* the Tooth Fairy do with all of those teeth she collects?
When a kid goes missing in your house, the first place you look (and usually find them) is in the pantry. Sneaking chocolate chips.
fake polite barber
19 hours ago