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The Mom List...again. Tired of it yet?

I realized yesterday that I posted the "How to Know You're a Mom" lists for three consecutive weeks, giving me just a couple more days to think of a list for the accidental trend I started.  Does this mean I'm crazy?  Then I cut myself some slack because, really, this is a blog.  And it's not like I have readers who are counting on me to post anything at all, let alone a weekly list of things that probably only apply to me.  Then I decided that maybe I *do* want to make it a weekly thing because it's fun for me, if no one else.  And now, I'm posting it. 

I also realize that my posts would be a lot shorter if I didn't first carry you through my excessively random thought processes.  Sometimes I feel like my brain is full of thoughts just floating around like a room full of butterflies...that have all consumed a couple of Red Bulls and a pack of Vivarin.

With that, here is my maybe-weekly post of How to Know You're a Mom-isms.  Hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy coming up with them!
  • You've said, "Yes, you can have another hot dog...if you eat a few more Cheetos."  And several minutes passed before you realized the absurdity of that statement.
  • The prospect of dessert has become one of your best bargaining tools.
  • You start to identify your children based on the stereotypes in the Breakfast Club.  You have a brain, an athlete, a basketcase, a princess, and a criminal.  Ultimately though, Brian was right, each one of them is a little bit of them all.
  • You've learned to point your kid towards the nurse giving shots so they don't associate your face with the pain.
  • You ask your kids if they have any special requests from the grocery store, knowing full well the answers will be chocolate pudding and fruit snacks.  Every time.
  • You spot your two-year old carrying around a box of vanilla wafers that you know you left on the top shelf of the pantry.  You don't have to try too hard to imagine her scaling the shelves to reach it.  And really, after an effort of that magnitude, didn't she kind of earn them?
  • In an attempt to make the bedtime routine even a little bit shorter, you do collective storytime.  This means your six year old boy has to sit through Purplicious, the story about how fabulous the colors pink and purple are, and your two year old girl has to endure Dinosaurs: the fossil hunters, the juvenile non-fiction book about paleontology. 
  • Before having kids, you swore up and down that your child would never love dinosaurs, go out in public with crazy hair or a mismatching outfit, or cry in a restaurant.  Then you had kids.  And you learned that "never" is a term that can't be used lightly.
  • Christmas morning has become exciting again!  (Yes, it's worthy of an exclamation mark!)  Perhaps even more than ever!
  • There's no sweeter sound than your kids singing the blessing together before a meal.
  • Lists are your friends.  Not because you're super organized, but because since having kids you have the memory of Dory.
  • You get hand cramps signing all of your family's names on Christmas cards....after the first couple.  (Seriously..."Love, Sam, Jennie, Ben, Abby, & Sarah" is a lot of writing!)
Until next time...

6 comments:

Katie J said...

You know I love reading these things so your line "And it's not like I have readers who are counting on me to post anything at all" is false. Thanks! And yes, Abby deserves those nilla wafers.

Jennie said...

Well of course I meant, "it's not like I have readers [except for Katie]"...duh.

Diane said...

does that mean that the rest of us don't count?

and yes, Abby deserves those Nilla Wafers!

Kathleen @ Measuring My Life said...

Great list, I def was thinking "check" on several of those statements.

As for the cards, I've now resorted to just signing The X Family, and you have two more names that I have to write, lols.

Cara said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like Dory :) and i've only got one little one running around. Tell me please it doesn't get worse but instead just levels off? RIGHT??!!??!

Anonymous said...

Love it! and yes Abby deinitely deserves those wafers :)

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