In the words of George Costanza, "I don't know, I like stuff you don't have to think about too much."
That is, to me, the definition of relaxation. Allowing my brain to take a break. Completely. And then add laughing to it. Bliss, I tell you.
I'm sure there are other (better) ways to reset the brain. Feel free to share those with me. What do you do to give your brain a vacation? That's your homework assignment. Please enlighten me.
In the meantime, for your entertainment, please enjoy my favorite lines from thirteen of my favorite brain vacations:
Rumack: Can you fly this plane, and land it?
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
- Dumb & Dumber
Harry: I thought the Rocky Mountains would be a little rockier than this.
Lloyd: Yeah, that John Denver is full of [another word for poo], man.
- Down Periscope
XO Pascoe: Buckman! There was a fingernail in my food, you moron! Yesterday, it was a band-
Buckman: I'm sorry, sir. The Band-Aid was holding the fingernail on.
- Young Frankenstein
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Werewolf?
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What?
Igor: There, wolf. There, castle.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Why are you talking that way?
Igor: I thought you wanted to.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No, I don't want to.
Igor: [shrugs] Suit yourself. I'm easy.
- Blazing Saddles
Lyle: Come on, boys! The way you're lollygaggin' around here with them picks and them shovels, you'd think it was a hundert an' twenty degree. Can't be more than a hundert an' fourteen.
- The Naked Gun
Frank: It's the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year's Day.
Frank: No, the worst.
- National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
Clark: Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?
Eddie: Naw, I'm doing just fine, Clark.
Dark Helmet: So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.
- Hot Shots: Part Deux
Topper Harley: Ramada, I want to be with you. I want to hold you. I want to meet your parents and pet your dog.
Ramada Rodham Hayman: My parents are dead, Topper. My dog ate them.
- Robin Hood Men in Tights
Little John: Let me introduce you to my best friend: Will Scarlet.
Scarlet: Scarlet's my middle name. My full name is Will Scarlet O'Hara. [pause] We're from Georgia.
- Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
Bill: So-crates - "The only true wisdom consists in knowing that you know nothing".
Ted: That's us, dude.
- Happy Gilmore
Shooter McGavin: You're in big trouble though, pal. I eat pieces of [another word for poo] like you for breakfast!
Happy Gilmore: [laughing] You eat pieces of [another word for poo] for breakfast?
Shooter McGavin: [long pause] No!
- Billy Madison
Principal: Mr. Madison, what you have just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
Billy Madison: Okay, a simple "wrong" would've done just fine.
This concludes today's (PG version of the) Thursday 13. To see more participants, go here!