Little Llamas and their Momma Drama (otherwise known as Mom Things)

You emerge from the second of two 30-second restroom breaks you afford yourself during the day only to immediately hear these very nonchalant words out of your oldest child's mouth:  "Sarah just went out front completely naked.  It's okay.  I got her."

While your husband is out of town on business (AGAIN), you opt for a dinner out on the town after the first day of school, in lieu of cooking.  Thinking that their first choice would be Taco Bell (as it usually is) was a mistake.  Your children requested Golden Corral, the all-you-can-eat buffet with what couldn't possibly be less than a full mile of food options.  While that did sound tasty, the prospect of taking three small-ish children to a buffet single-handedly was enough to convince you not to go.  It was awfully nice of the kids to have complete confidence in your ability to carry 4 plates at a time though.

After convincing them that Taco Bell was, in fact, a much better option, you hear your suddenly-precocious four year old proclaim as she gazed out the window on the way, "Those are some handsome boys in that car!"  Since when does she think boys are handsome enough to comment on?  One day in school and she's already a harlot. 

As you anxiously awaited a report from your Pre-K-going four year old about her first day, your experienced second grader quickly chimed in with, "I love everything about second grade."  (Goody-two-shoes.) 

Despite the fact that our society has demonized male elementary school teachers (and nurses and pediatricians and piano instructors and childcare workers), you were absolutely thrilled with the first impression of your four year old's male Pre-K teacher.  And the fact that her face lights up with a smile at the mere mention of his name is all the confirmation you need.  (Turns out, he must be pretty silly to win that little girl over so quickly.)

While it may have seemed that your girls were playing "Easter Egg Hunt" with pieces of chalk in the garden and a couple of buckets, you peek into one of said buckets a few minutes later only to find this:

It's okay, there are still a few blooms left out front after their shenanigans.

At first you worried that your daughters' naked water fights/races/flower picking sessions in the backyard would scare off potential buyers from your neighbor's on-the-market home, but then you thought, it's probably better that they know what they're getting themselves into with us for neighbors after all.

Look at her!  Caught red-handed stealing another one!

Since your husband is away, your seven year old convinces you to let him have a slumber party in your bedroom.  Turns out, his room is too bright, but your room is too dark.  Maybe Goldilocks needs to try another room to find one that's "just right".  Incidentally, you recap the parallels of the story to your son and refer to him as "Goldilocks", and you are delighted that the new nickname was received with the sincerest of seven year old giggles.

You shouldn't have worried about your youngest occupying herself while the big kids were away at school.  She had no trouble coming up with some ideas.

Sometimes something as simple as pajama choice reveals how exceedingly different your children are from each other. 

 (In case it's not obvious, those are fleece footie pajamas, no pajamas, and a more-practical-for-summer-in-Georgia shorts set.)

But she tried so hard to get them down from her closet, you let her keep them on.  She was rockin' those things.

Luckily, your third child isn't really aware of birthdates (or at least doesn't hold you to them) because just days ago, three months after her actual birthday, you finally presented her with her (combination first and) second birthday gift.  As it turns out, she just wanted the box anyway.  At least her big sister likes the water table.

Maybe next time I won't stay away from Mom Things for so long...
Maybe next time I won't be so wordy...
Maybe...