Not My Friend Anymore

I've lost a few Facebook friends in the past few weeks.  I guess they were intolerant of my alleged intolerance.  Or maybe they're just tired of my incessant updates about the mundane things in my life that trip me out - like our bacon-3-ways experiment at lunch the other day (fyi - the kids prefer baked bacon to fried or microwaved).  Or perhaps they're weary of the never-ending photo posts of my kids doing cooky things - like making our own Rosetta stone or fashioning a ramp for their razor scooter out of a lawn chair and a bucket or coloring all over themselves or drooling out rice cereal.

 

Or maybe they just don't like me.  Period.

My problem is that I care.

I have always cared what people think about me.  What a terrible burden to bear.  I spend way too much time guessing what other people think of me.  I mask these feelings in insecurity, which I know now is a deep-rooted form of narcissism, pride, self-indulgence.  The fact is, people don't think about me much at all.  And even if they do, it's probably not as bad as I think it is.  And even if it is as bad as I think it is, it just doesn't matter - provided I'm doing the best I can to live a life pleasing to and indicative of my relationship with Jesus.

I don't particularly care about the number of friends I have on Facebook.  It's not about the bottom line for me.  I do care about offending people, and I go to great lengths to be tactful.  Respect is important to me, if we agree, sure, but especially if we do not.  I take these things personally, and then I dwell.  Then it trickles into other parts of my life - my marriage, my kids.  Trust me, they don't know the answer to nor do they care about the question, "Why did they defriend me?"  I was not built to debate.  I was not constructed by my Creator to seek out and thrive on controversy.  It's not good for my health or my relationships.  (I say that partially in jest, but there's note of sincerity there.)

I have invested too much of my thought life on things that aren't important.  I don't need to wonder what others think about me.  Instead I need to concentrate on what I know God says about me.  I just finished a super cool summer Bible study with some friends where we delved into scripture and listened to how it spoke to us specifically.  (It was great - Can We Talk? by Priscilla Shirer. I recommend it!)  There was an entire week devoted to taking off our old selves and putting on the new. 

At the end of this week, there was a bonus section about our identity in Christ.  It was a breath of fresh air to read and claim God's feelings for me.  Among the many listed, here are a few that spoke to me:

I have access to God's wisdom.  James 1:5
I am tenderly loved by God.  Jeremiah 31:3
I am chosen by God to bear fruit.  John 15:6
I have been rescued from Satan's domain and transferred into the kingdom of Christ.  Colossians 1:13
I have been made complete in Christ.  Colossians 2:10
I cannot be separated from the love of God.  Romans 8:35
I am confident that the good work that God has begun in me will be perfected.  Philippians 1:6
I am God's workmanship.  Ephesians 2:10
I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength.  Philippians 4:13

If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.  2 Corinthians 5:17

I pray that as I mature, and as the sanctification process strips me of the "old" I'll stop caring about who defriended me on Facebook and why.  Because, the one that supercedes anyone on Facebook won't defriend me. I cannot be separated from the love of God.  

How do you feel about being defriended on Facebook?  Are you on Facebook?  Perhaps the fact that I'm writing about this at all means I need to cut out that idol?  Tell me your thoughts!  I'd love to hear them.